I’ve been getting more commissions lately. Surprisingly it’s been a good few weeks. This summer was a bad low period for me. But I am hoping this momentum keeps going. I’m hoping that if I get some more commissions soon that I will be able to afford a Switch 2. I want to play games like Pokopia and Splatoon Raiders so badly…. Maybe even Ocarina Of Time. I use to have a friend who constantly recommended that game. Hopefully one will be in my grasp soon. I have so much FOMO right now. Not just about the Switch 2; but for a lot of things.
Fear Of Wasting Time
I think my biggest struggle with my current project is settling on what to do. I know WHAT I want to do. But I keep struggling with the idea of “is this worth it though”. I keep getting hit with thoughts like “what if nobody engages with it”. A don’t want to create my projects purely for money, or attention. I want to create them for me. But it’s hard not feeling stressed out when I have to make an income for my work. A lot of times on social media when you put a crap-ton of effort into something, it never seems to payoff. However, when you make a silly little no-effort piece of art, somehow that tends to be the one that resonates with people.
My last animation, is one I made for my comic. A tie-in. I felt proud of it, and just wanted people to see it. But it was only met with a couple of hundred views, and 75 likes. I’m appreciative of everyone who supports me through and through; and I know likes on social media aren’t everything. But sometimes it does sting when barely anybody has seen a piece of work that you poured your blood, sweat and tears, into for months.
I say all of this, but that is not going to stop me from working on my next project. I will get it done, even if only one person views it. It is something I need to get off of my chest.
Obsessed With Obsession
Watched Obsession twice this past week and was blown away by it. Very masterful writing and film making. The script was so tight and and meaningful it has me feeling inspired with my own work. Am noticing that the movie is a bit of a litmus test. Was disappointed watching some of my favorite YouTube critics discuss the film. They liked it, but it seems like the movie’s themes went completely over their head. Anyway, this is my movie of the year. Everyone should watch it. Bye.